new house with awesome roommates, in the process of looking for a new job, birthday, cancelled wedding plans. my life revolves around these things, but when i lean back into my feather pillow, get lost in the smell, when the dust and the feathers settle, it sinks in a little deeper. i. am. still. broken. into many many pieces. controversial, jaded, menial pieces. how do i mend them? ive done my part, but i know that i cant do this on my own. ive trudged this far, sometimes even crawling but i am no longer able to do it alone. i need help. and love. the kind that no one is willing to give. fuck. this.